Dyslexic terrorist runs into trouble with 3D printer

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May 11, 2013 by Doug Coutts

1898619_110204084734_IMG_3103A would-be terrorist with learning difficulties has had to put his plans on hold after the 3D printer he bought from the Warehouse failed to produce exactly what he wanted. “I typed in G, U and N,” Shining People of the Redemption Star activist Howard Yews-Pellit told WWNews via satellite cell-phone from his hideout in Lowry Bay. “But something went wrong and I ended up with a giant plastic animal, a wildebeest or something. “

Howard believes the keyboard layout made things confusing, and thinks people with apostrophisation issues would have similar problems. “Imagine if I’d wanted to make pens”

The Warehouse is standing by its products, to prevent shoplifting.

TVNZ News is standing by its reporters who erroneously use the word ‘sunk’ when they mean ‘sank’. Head of Corporate Affairs Lila Lyrapantsonfire told WWNews it was part of a deliberate effort to connect with the common people. “Many of our viewers are uneducated and don’t speak proper. This is an attempt to reach them in terms they understand.” Ms Lyrapanstonfire said the effort to connect with the common people would not include being paid a similar wage or mingling in pubs with them.

And in boring news that you’d wish would just go away, Aaron Gilmore continues to hog the headlines. (Chortle)

Weather for the whole North Island is set to continue, which is good because we’d hate to think what might happen if it just stopped.

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