Weakly Whirled News receives letter from lawyer

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April 23, 2013 by Doug Coutts

Dear Sirs
That parking ticket we got you off – pay the bill or we tell the judge you
really were putting milk tokens in the meter
Messrs Hedge Bicker & Quibble


Meanwhile, in other news….

Maurice Williamson to do TV show circuit

Maurice-Williamson-looking-shocked-GettyMaverick National MP Maurice Williamson is back in the headlines, this time for his sell-out performance during last week’s hysteric oops historic Marriage Revival Bill passage.

Williamson, previously best known for his uncanny resemblance to Barry Humphries’ alter-ego Sir Les Paterson, has become a hit thanks to a clever speech designed for maximum impact with minimal commitment.

Already he’s booked to appear with talk-show maven Ellen Degeneres, previously best known for her uncanny resemblance to Jon Gadsby, and other offers are pouring in. David Letterman has asked him to front a Top Ten List segment called “The Ten Top Reasons Why Real Statesmen Won’t Do Cheap TV Stunts”, and Oprah has scheduled him as a standby in case she can’t get the aunt of the girlfriend of the brother of a neighbour of someone who met one of the Boston bombers at a party at Rolf Harris’s three years ago.

Then he’s off for a three-week stint as a celebrity judge on Belgium’s Got Talent No Really, followed by an hour-long talk about right-wing political theory on Kim Kardashian’s new chat show. In June Mr Williamson will be one half of the Blue Team (naturally) on The Block Mongolia and he’ll be back in the House in August once filming is complete on a new series of Top Town where he’ll play the part of a giant inflated ego we mean obstacle.

Mr Williamson is delighted with his meteoric rise in the fame stakes. “But it’s not just about me,” he told WWNews because it was our shout. “Because what’s good for Maurice is good for National.” He declined to elaborate further because “the last time I said what Keysie was good for, I got in trouble.”

Prime Minister is relaxed about his member’s good fortune. “I think it’s good for the country to see their politicians being media patsies overseas,” he told WWNews once his press secretary had gone AWOL. “Too many people think we should sit in Parliament and pass laws and I think it’s time we showed that we don’t.”


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