Mum and Dad investors get hang of asset sales

After only 24 hours on the market, shares in Mighty River Power, the first of the Government’s fundraising ventures, have been oversubscribed many times over.

“If only we’d been able to get moving sooner, we’d have a whole lot of stuff on the market,” Prime Mover and Shaker John Keys told WWNews on condition we told TVNZ’s Simon Bradwell, banned from the Press Gallery until he shaves.  Or hits puberty

Mr Keys went on to say that selling more stuff would relieve pressure on Government reserves.  “And on the public service as well.  Fewer stuff to run means less people to run it.  It all stacks up, innit.”

Mum and Dad investers have taken to the new scheme like a duck to water or the TVNZ stylebook to a dumpster.  Many are so keen they can hardly wait for the next sale.

“We have our eyes on buying shares in a lovely property if Mr Keys puts it on the market,” said Pakuranga mother of twelve Hona Sawreddy. “We bought it in 1947 and have enjoyed living there immensely. It’s where all our kids were conceived, along with some misfires, and it holds a lot of memories.  Plus we’ve just finished paying off the mortgage at last.  So it’s only natural we’d like to own shares when it’s privatised.”


Categories: In Breaking News

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