Weakly Whirled News Plus – a new experience for readers

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February 15, 2013 by Doug Coutts

Colossus was used to break German ciphers duri...

Here at Weakly Whirled News, we’re nothing if not innovative. So we chose to be innovative today, and started early to work on ways to make your browsing experience much more fun.

We couldn’t think of anything. Browsing is not designed to be fun; it’s one frustration after another interspersed with moments of tedium. And just when you think there’s light at the end of the tunnel, up comes a Facebook page where three people in a row have commented “WTF!?!” because they can’t bear to be left out of the conversation. This is what the internet has brought us to.

The internet has also brought a vast number of people to this page– see the stats over there =>, which does put the pressure on us to provide some level of entertainment. Which is why, just minutes ago, we came up with WWNews+.

Based loosely on Google+™ in that we copied the plus sign, WWNews+ will enhance and expand readers’ experience. (Or reader’s experience, depending on how well it goes down.) For a start we’ll be looking at ways to reduce the number of tyops.

Studies have shown that people once looked to the internet for information, on-line dating and bargains that turn out not to be bargains (those last two are often the same thing).

Times have changed and now social networking is the reason most users spend days on end on the ‘net. Sites like Facebook and Google+ give you the freedom to have an active social life without ever leaving your desk. Your actual life is a little less active though – instead of exercising your smiling muscles you just type LOL, and eyebrow raising is a thing of the past now that WTF is common currency.

People with flabby eyebrow muscles need amusement just as much as normal folk so WWNews+ will provide a whole new level of interactivity. We plan to offer pretty much everything that the other sites do, with names that don’t offer the merest hint at what they might be for. Like Micro$oft and Google, our developers think that discovery is fun, and working out how to open an app is as enjoyable as learning it doesn’t do anything remotely useful.

So stay tuned. We’ll be rolling out enhancements as soon as they come off the developers’ memory sticks, and before we have a chance to test them. First down the chute is likely to be a new way of interacting with other internet users without using a keyboard, followed closely by an app that will let you count the number of coffee beans left in your grinder without moving from your chair. (There still some bugs in the system including lack of existential justification, but work continues apace.)

We’ll keep you posted, even though that’s such an outdated term these days. In the meantime, if you wouldn’t mind, please click on the Blogarama link on the right. It’ll make us rich, and give you some exercise.

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