Old news is good news, if you dress it up


You are all blimmen liars and you’re teaching your children to follow in your footsteps.  That’s according to a survey just published in the Waikato Times, part of the mighty Fairfax Empire.

Actually the Waikato Times is something of a jewel in the Fairfax crown, due to the prodigious output of its Hamiltonian journalists.  Having six fingers on each hand obviously helps with the typing speed.

Essentially, the report says that 81% of New Zealanders know someone who tells fibs, steals from the stationery cupboard at work and is about as faithful to his or her partner as a dieting dog in a sausage factory.

What’s worse is that if us Kiwis don’t know someone who lies and cheats we’ll step up and do it ourselves.

And what’s even worse is our children are picking up our bad habits, learning at their mother’s knee as it were, which must be especially difficult if their mother’s knee happens to be under the duvet with Brian the plumber.

This is one more sign of the irreversible breakdown of the  fabric of society, due no doubt to putting it through the wringer too many times.  Well, it would be if it weren’t for one small thing.  Where did we learn to be absolute rotters?  Exactly. From our mums and dads.  And where did they pick it up from?  Probably a book.

So rest easy.  Thieving, telling porkies and getting a bit on the side are all part of the human condition.  You can either live with it or start a company marketing polls that tells us stuff we already know.  (You might just have to beef up some of the facts, in order to sell them.)


Categories: In Breaking News

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